
Pink snakeskin-embossed Bandolino slingbacks
Shoes are one of our first and most primary possessions. Even little kids get way into their shoes* — they’re the first objects which are exclusively “mine” but yet not fully “me.” In the folktale of Cinderella, shoes are emblematic of transformation (from isolation to community, loneliness to love, loss to rediscovery)**. Cinderella’s coach turned back into a pumpkin at midnight, so how did the glass slipper remain? Because shoes are magic. They connect our transformed fantasy with our everyday reality. They are ours, but just beyond us.
Shoes are intimate but public. Shoes are functional, they are decorative. And I do believe they have the power to transform us. I think there might be two kinds of women — those who believe in Shoe Magic and those who deny it. I was a skeptic for like 20 years. Shoes are personal, so I can’t presume to tell you exactly what shoes to wear. But I will tell you that shoes are an opportunity and if you haven’t yet taken it, your life can change if you do.
Of course we have to wear the right shoes at the right place and time. Wear the shoes that are required for your vocational or recreational activities. But think beyond the demands and limitations on shoes — allow them to be happy and fabulous. If you have hang ups about your body, spare your feet. Your feet are not fat (the late Diana, Princess of Wales wore a size 9 and did she not look fabulous?) Almost everyone’s feet are a bit quirky, but it’s possible to find beautiful shoes that fit.
Today I’m posting pictures of my heels. Don’t think of heels as a single kind of shoe. Heels are place on the shoe – on many, many kinds of shoes — where a shoe may be elegantly elevated in a flattering way. I wasn’t convinced until I read it in O Magazine (as a general rule, I trust O to shit me not) that if you’re looking to improve your professional wardrobe, “wear heels.” If you think all heels are uncomfortable, “keep shopping.” A good heel makes your legs look great, makes your walk more confident, and improves the look of your outfit. If you wobble, keep shopping – it’s not just the heel height but lateral support and heel structure that give a shoe stabilitiy.

Cole haan red loafer; Pink Patent leather slingback wedge; Circa Joan & David toe-tone leater; Purple Kate Spade Stiletto

Cole Haan Carma Open-toe pump; Fred Meyer brown heel with bow.
Lower heels:

Three low-heeled shoes. The one on the right I only wear with pants.
I have a variety of heel heights because I have a variety of pant lengths — theoretically you should hem your pants to the shoe, but I haven’t perfected that art, so I do a lot of switching around. Cute shoes can be slipped on with an otherwise boring outfit (Me: blue trousers. brown sweater) and make a cool outfit. Great shoes can be worn with a nice outfit and make a superstar outfit. Heels are pretty and once I got used to them, they seriously improved my stature and presence whenever I wear them. This used to be way out of my reach, and now it’s not, I’m really into it. It’s a joy I wish on everyone.
Coming up: pictures of my old, boring shoes, as well as my comfortable flats and loafers, summer sandals, my “weekend shoes” (that I’m not totally happy with right now). And boots, which should not be worn in summer!
*Toddlers and shoes are discussed in Your Two Year Old: Tender or Terrible, by Louise Bates Ames & and Frances Ilg. These books are the gold standard in explaining phases of early childhood development (their “advice” can be dated and weird but the underlying research is reliable). It’s so reassuring to see that my kids freakish behavior is developmentally normal. Once I remember that, it’s easier for me to empathize and develop age-appropriate expectations and discipline tools.
**The Cinderella story has been repeated through cultures and over the centuries, but it is almost always about a shoe: in Strato’s Rhodopis, 1st c. B.C. it is a sandal; Ye Xian, China 860 AD it is a slipper.
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